Yes, it’s a story of triumph over very difficult circumstances and never giving up hope. But ultimately, it’s about ubuntu, about a group of people who came together across divides to show what magic can happen when we open our hearts to give graciously and receive graciously.
At the beginning of 2024 S’thabile Duma faced what she thought were almost insurmountable challenges. She had no idea how she was going to get through her final year of industrial engineering at Stellenbosch University (SU).
In the first week of February Duma had no place to stay and she feared she would not be able to register due to outstanding debt.
The housing crisis had reached a peak in Stellenbosch and, like many desperate students, the young woman was literally knocking on doors, begging for accommodation.
She walked the streets for kilometres in the scorching February sun searching for a place to stay, struggling to hold back the tears.
A little more than a year later, Duma allowed the tears to flow freely, but for a very special reason.
This time she cried for joy and profound gratitude, as she celebrated obtaining her degree with her new Stellenbosch “family”.
When Duma needed support most Ben and Jeanneret Momberg opened their hearts and home to her.
Passionate about helping
Duma had always been very self-reliant. “I’m someone who doesn’t like to worry people; I try to sort things out for myself. But this time I had run out of ways to save myself.”
Her despair last year, in a way, was ironic since she’d been a dedicated volunteer with Action4Inclusion, an initiative steered by SU’s Centre for Social Justice to support the “missing middle” students, to close the gap between talent and financial need.
“For three years I had been helping others clear their student debts, finding ways to raise funds through organising events such as the annual Social Justice Walk. In all that time I didn’t want anyone in the Action4Inclusion group to know of my own struggles. I always found a way to pay my fees by knocking on the doors at SU’s Development and Alumni Relations Office, student finances and the engineering faculty, which assisted with such things as bursaries and accommodation.”
But when she could see no way out of her situation, and was ready to give up and return home to KwaZulu-Natal, she confided in a friend. A few calls later the wheels were put in motion by Action4Inclusion’s team.
“I remember Prof Thuli Madonsela, the director of the Centre for Social Justice, calling me in the late afternoon, very concerned. She was hurt I had not said something sooner. She assured me she would do her best to reach out to the community and find help for me.”
The first lifeline came from a friend of Madonsela who offered to assist with the outstanding debt. “I was completely overwhelmed when it dawned on me that I could now register. I still struggle to find the words to express my gratitude.”
Unconditional love
A week before classes were due to start Duma received a call from Jeanneret, offering her a place to stay on her family farm near Stellenbosch. “It came as a huge relief. Initially the plan was for me to stay for a few weeks while I looked for something permanent.”
Jeanneret had also been involved with Action4Inclusion for a few years. When Madonsela connected her with Duma, the Momberg family wa still reeling from a tragedy.
At the end of 2023 Jeanneret and Ben’s son Benje was shot by armed robbers at a pub in Stellenbosch and left paralysed.
At Duma’s graduation party Momberg movingly shared how in a few short weeks she had become like a daughter to them. She paid tribute to the “ray of sunshine” Duma was, one shining in on the family at a difficult time in its life.
“We all just fell in love with her,” Jeanneret declared.
Duma’s temporary living arrangement with the Mombergs soon turned permanent.
She admitted she initially struggled with preconceived ideas of white Afrikaans people. When Ben offered to give her a lift to town on the first day of class, she was nervous.
“As I waited in the parking area I thought ‘what have you got yourself into?’ When Ben came out he said ‘Hi S’tha’ and opened the door for me. Nobody had ever done that for me! Ben turned out to be the sweetest, kindest man I’d ever met.”
Duma later found out he didn’t really have to attend to business in town as he had claimed, but went out of his way to take her to campus every day. “He did it with so much devotion and care. I will never forget it.
“I had never experienced such love from people I didn’t know. They are such a cool, inspiring family. We often sat at the dinner table together. Sundays were my favourite because it was most likely braai time.
“During exam time I was spoilt rotten. Jeanneret made sure I had a big breakfast with eggs for my ‘thinking juices’. She asked what I wanted for lunch, and when I arrived home dinner was waiting in the microwave.”
Paying it forward
Looking back on past year, S’thabile was reminded of a famous quote associated with Madonsela, that “it takes a village to raise a child”.
“I saw that and experienced it. All these people came together to help me, and it has changed my life forever. Because of this community I am now a graduate. I share my story not only to express gratitude but to urge people to keep giving. Even if you don’t have money to donate you can share your resources or your time. I plan to pay it forward and help others whenever I can.”
This weekend the Mombergs will help their erstwhile house guest move into a new flat in Cape Town, where she will soon start work.
“Being part of S’thabile’s journey is a true blessing,” Momberg said. “Her story is a beautiful expression of ubuntu, of what’s possible when we support one another. Helping a bright young woman realise her potential is a privilege. We want our young people to dream big, to rise above their circumstances, and to know they are never alone.”
• S’thabile and Jeanneret encourage people to donate to the Action4Inclusion initiative.
